4 new teeth + 1 relentless cold + 1 gratuitous ear infection = amoxicillin, benzocaine & tylenol w/ codeine
…yet another reason to say MATH SUCKS.
Category Archives: Teething
Ouch.
Sleep Journal: Day 209
Poor little McGoo. He has been teething for going on eleventeen weeks now. The bottom front two came in with little fanfare, however he is on the 10-year plan in getting those heinous two top fronts and their side-by-sides. It started weeks ago and just seems to be dragging on, and on, and on. And on. Not only is he carrying a consistent dosage of some variety of pain reliever in his system at all times (we are thinking it would be more efficient to just switch to a Tylenol patch), but he is still holding out on this whole sleep thing. As in, he won’t. Throw in the time-change, and a house with bad acoustics, and you have a reason to drink. A lot. As I explained to my mother-in-law, there is a moment each evening, wherein I have to either drink alcohol or caffeine, or I’ll die.
Aside from the whole teeth-and-sleep thing, otherwise known as the OBVIOUS IMPLICATIONS UNDERTAKEN WHEN PROCREATING, there is the fact that he is this close to crawling in a direction other than backward or sideways. Right now, his best trick is getting himself wedged under things. Where’s Porter? Oh, under the couch again. Hear Porter crying in the next room? No biggie, he has probably just scooted himself under an open drawer again. Oh, you left him in his crib to play for a while? That’s fine, except he has most-likely wriggled both of his legs through the slats – ultimately pinning himself, yet again. One might call it his super-power – being able to wedge himself in the most unlikely of places…which should come in handy as he tries to flee future abuses at the hands of his n’er-do-well older sister.
Add to this scenario a snot-clogging, wheeze-making, even-less-sleep-getting cold, and I have no choice but to blog about it.
But here’s the thing: Through all of this insanity, and chaos, and potential for me to rue the day I ever considered having unprotected sex, I can still manage to break a genuine smile when it is 4:30 in the morning and I see Porter’s little profile in shadow, hear him make that funny Frankenstein noise and realize that I am, indeed, up for the day. Again.
Porter McGoo Turns 6 Months Old
Happy 6-month birthday, Porter!
I know that in the years to come, as you read through these pages it will probably seem like all I do is drone on and on about your sister and her antics, while only referring to you by names like Baron Von Cutenstein. Although this may be a tiny bit true, I know there are going to be many days in the years to come wherein I will tell the world about how you decided to bury the tv remote in a potted plant. Don’t worry, your day will come. In the meantime, feel good that all I can do is tell you how cute you are.
The fact is, you are becoming more and more independent every day, and – based on your agility of late – will be crawling quicker than I can say baby-proofing. I took a short video clip of you today and managed to catch some of my favorite things that I love most about you right now. Look closely and you’ll observe:
- The cute noise you make when you chew (not suck) on your thumb.
- Your fauxhawk.
- The way you sit up by yourself without tipping over.
- That frankenstein noise you make when you start to laugh.
- That everything within an arms reach will eventually make it into your mouth.
Oh, and if those front teeth aren’t in by the end of the month, I am sure your dad will be on eBay ordering you up a pair. Not to mention, we are both tired of holding you up over our heads only to have you give us a huge smile while simultaneously unleashing a gigantic blob of drool onto our face.