Category Archives: Developmental

Milestones and almost-milestones.

Sleep Journal: Day 209

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Poor little McGoo. He has been teething for going on eleventeen weeks now. The bottom front two came in with little fanfare, however he is on the 10-year plan in getting those heinous two top fronts and their side-by-sides. It started weeks ago and just seems to be dragging on, and on, and on. And on. Not only is he carrying a consistent dosage of some variety of pain reliever in his system at all times (we are thinking it would be more efficient to just switch to a Tylenol patch), but he is still holding out on this whole sleep thing. As in, he won’t. Throw in the time-change, and a house with bad acoustics, and you have a reason to drink. A lot. As I explained to my mother-in-law, there is a moment each evening, wherein I have to either drink alcohol or caffeine, or I’ll die.

Aside from the whole teeth-and-sleep thing, otherwise known as the OBVIOUS IMPLICATIONS UNDERTAKEN WHEN PROCREATING, there is the fact that he is this close to crawling in a direction other than backward or sideways. Right now, his best trick is getting himself wedged under things. Where’s Porter? Oh, under the couch again. Hear Porter crying in the next room? No biggie, he has probably just scooted himself under an open drawer again. Oh, you left him in his crib to play for a while? That’s fine, except he has most-likely wriggled both of his legs through the slats – ultimately pinning himself, yet again. One might call it his super-power – being able to wedge himself in the most unlikely of places…which should come in handy as he tries to flee future abuses at the hands of his n’er-do-well older sister.

Add to this scenario a snot-clogging, wheeze-making, even-less-sleep-getting cold, and I have no choice but to blog about it.

But here’s the thing: Through all of this insanity, and chaos, and potential for me to rue the day I ever considered having unprotected sex, I can still manage to break a genuine smile when it is 4:30 in the morning and I see Porter’s little profile in shadow, hear him make that funny Frankenstein noise and realize that I am, indeed, up for the day. Again.

The Ibuprofin Brigade

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And, I’m back. With back-to-back grandparent visits squarely behind us I am delighted to say that my children have not required stays at the post-grandparent-visit rehab center. You know, the one where children are de-programmed of the delusions that life exists for no other reason than to serve their every whim.

Each grandparent visit took on a slightly different strategic plan. My mother’s decision was to divide and conquer, taking on one kid each day she was here, and letting the other go to their respective care facility while I was at work. The grandparents Walston approach (being that there were 2 of them) opted to go full monty, taking on both Walstonlings for the duration of their visit – even throwing in an all-nighter. The word glutton springs immediately to mind. The sum total of each visit however, had the same outcome: a granddaughter who has started to realize the gravity of good-bye.

During each visit, there was a moment wherein Stella calmly, yet with the power of an emotional wrecking ball, asked each grandparent to stay. With my mom, it was the morning they were playing together in the yard, and out of nowhere Stella asked, “Grandma, will you stay?” To which, my mother could only respond, “I’m not going anywhere. We can play all day.” “No, Grandma. I want you to stay.” With the grandparents Walston, it came right as they were saying their good-byes on Sunday night to head back to their trailer. No matter how delicately and logically they tried explaining their departure, Stella could only reply with one response, “Don’t go.”

I swear, there are moments when I’m absolutely certain that her honesty and innocence is going to make my heart explode within my chest and ooze out of my ears. I just wish I could conjure these feelings right about the moment I am ready to dangle her by her feet for refusing to sleep past 5:00am.

Alas, even with all of these heartwrenching moments, it took her about 32 seconds to settle right back into her old routines, like insisting on working some form of the word poop into every sentence that leaves her mouth.

Scared Straight

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A couple of weeks ago, on our way home from the afternoon pick-up rounds, I looked in my rearview mirror and was horrified to see Stella’s face looking straight at me. She was, literally, standing up in her carseat. I was pretty well aware of the fact that she could buckle herself in and out on her own. It was not at all uncommon for her to close the door and insist that I let her do it herself. However, I thought I had made it clear that this was an only-when-the-car-isn’t-moving type activity.

Not wanting this to become yet another power struggle with her, I had to make a split second decision as to how I could impress upon her the heinous things that might befall her should she ever attempt this again. I immediately pulled the car over, turned it off, spun around and with my most controlled, bad-ass mom voice I could muster, told her to Sit. Down. NOW. I then, in an equally don’t-mess-with-me-on-this-one tone, told her to never unbuckle her seatbelt again while the car is moving. It is a rare occasion that she does anything the first time I ask. This, however, was such an occassion. And let me tell you, it made me heady with maternal power.

As she buckled herself in and explained to me, “but I coudln’t reach my book!,” I told her that not only was it my rule that she wear her seatbelt, but that it was a law, and that the police would pull us over and give us a ticket if they saw her not wearing it. I refrained from giving her a screening of Highway, Bloody Highway, but did impress upon her the bodily injury that may befall her if she chose to defy my orders. As has happened many times in our discussions over the last three years, I found myself once again reasoning with her using a concept that had absolutely NO meaning to her. I thought I was being so wise by trying to play the “Police” card, not realizing that the concept of police hasn’t yet had an opportunity to be played out. Until today.

As we were driving to school this morning we came upon a highway patrolman detouring traffic around a car that had, apparently, driven off the road. There was a man’s hat laying in the middle of the street, and the whole thing had ‘suspicious activity’ written all over it. As we made our way around the scene, and headed towards school, we came upon three police cars with doors open lights on and a man on his knees, cuffed in the middle of it all. As we were slowly detoured around the whole thing, Stella watched intently from the back seat. Then, in a quiet and ominous voice she said, “Mommy, I don’t think he was wearing his seatbelt.”

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Update: Apparently, it was a bit more than just a seatbelt infraction.
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Porter McGoo Turns 6 Months Old

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Happy 6-month birthday, Porter!

I know that in the years to come, as you read through these pages it will probably seem like all I do is drone on and on about your sister and her antics, while only referring to you by names like Baron Von Cutenstein. Although this may be a tiny bit true, I know there are going to be many days in the years to come wherein I will tell the world about how you decided to bury the tv remote in a potted plant. Don’t worry, your day will come. In the meantime, feel good that all I can do is tell you how cute you are.

The fact is, you are becoming more and more independent every day, and – based on your agility of late – will be crawling quicker than I can say baby-proofing. I took a short video clip of you today and managed to catch some of my favorite things that I love most about you right now. Look closely and you’ll observe:

  • The cute noise you make when you chew (not suck) on your thumb.
  • Your fauxhawk.
  • The way you sit up by yourself without tipping over.
  • That frankenstein noise you make when you start to laugh.
  • That everything within an arms reach will eventually make it into your mouth.

Oh, and if those front teeth aren’t in by the end of the month, I am sure your dad will be on eBay ordering you up a pair. Not to mention, we are both tired of holding you up over our heads only to have you give us a huge smile while simultaneously unleashing a gigantic blob of drool onto our face.

Porter Video: 6 Months old

In the beginning….

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So, I’ll start things out with an status report.

Burglary
Recovery Status: Good
Although still totally bummed out about the things that will never be able to be replaced, we have forged ahead in getting back to daily life. Reclaiming our house was a big hurdle, installing a pricey alarm was key, as well as the obligatory shopping trip to fill in some of the gaps of what was taken. I would recommend this to no one and hope that none of you will ever have to go through it. Our advice to everyone: 1) review your homeowners policy — especially in regards to jewelry, 2) even if you choose not to have an alarm, see if you can get your hands on some alarm stickers — 1 in 4 unalarmed homes is burglarized, 1 in 600 alarmed homes is burglarized, and 3) get to know your neighbors, they can be your best ally (and you, theirs).

Countdown until Stella starts walking
Estimated days: 25-30
She is definitely taking her time, but if our exuberance for her to start crawling was any lesson, we are in no real rush to step up on the mobility front. She has given us a couple of little steps here and there, but overall would rather drop and fly than dangerously stagger along.

Steve’s work
Status: autopilot
The school year is moving along pretty quickly and there is little doubt that having this many personal distractions has made it that much harder to feel like the heart and soul are in it as much as he would like. Hopefully as our lives calm back down (yeah, right — the holiday/birthday season begins in three short weeks!), it will be easier to dedicate energies wholeheartedly back towards school.

Natalie’s work
Status: chaos
An announcement was just made that my department was going to undergo dismantling and reorganization. My position is going to be under major reconstruction. Which, incidentally, is a good thing. Additionally, things are starting to happen in the web office. Because of my history with all things web here on campus, I am in a good position to make some changes…..if I can make up my mind about the direction I want my career to take at this point.

That should do it for now. Photos to come along shortly.