One of things Stella inherited from her father (aside from her worship of the alimighty enchilada and the need to explain the most obscure details of any given situation) were two gigantic side-by-side cowlicks square on the crown of her scalp. They caused her to have an Alfalfa-style hairdo until she was, roughly, a year old. (The covergence of these two swirls caused the hair to collide in a way that forced the hair straight up.) As she got older, and her hair got longer, the weight finally allowed for her to no longer resemble one of the Little Rascals.

Instead, the affect is that the majority of her hair now grows forward, causing her bangs to start somewhere around the back of her head. Think sideways comb-over. This most unfortunate of hair growth patterns will, I am sure, drive her into therapy by the age of nine.

I never had any intention of giving her bangs, but somewhere along the line I realized that Stella had a rare disease that caused her hair to grow in a mullet-like syle, with bangs naturally forming and reaching all the way back to her ears. Again, I blame her father for this.

It is time I face the facts: my daughter is follically challenged.

Once I was able to come to terms with the reality of the situation, I made the decision to seek professional help. Just the look on the hairdressers face said it all: you have a long road ahead, but I will be with you every step of the way.