Cranking up the cute-o-meter.

Hi Stel,

It’s mama. Lately, I have been getting this sneaking feeling that if I don’t start recording some of your oh-so-cuteness, it will forever be buried under a pile of brain cells dedicated to hair dilemmas and car borrowing privileges. I need to do this periodically now that I know your MO, which involves a barrage of changing stages that tend to involve inhuman tests of strength and patience. Even after figuring this out, I am still caught off guard on a regular basis by your ability to morph from cute sweet and docile to firebreathing in the time it takes to change your diaper. If I have learned anything as a parent it is to never get too comfortable. One never knows when you are going to switch it up on us.

At least once every day, you pull out some amazing tightrope act that makes your father and I look at each other with a puzzled expression like, “Did you teach her that?” “No, did you?” We only have to wonder: Has Grani-K been bringing in special tutors at day care?

Like, for instance, when exactly did you learn to count? I would think it was The Count that taught you, except you don’t seem to have that really cool Transylvanian accent. You do, however, have the unmistakable Stella accent: “Unnn, Toooo, Feeee, Fooaar, Fieeee, Six!” Every once in a while you even throw in an 8, just to mix things up a little.

And while we are on the subject of talking, I feel like I need to give you big points in the patience department when it comes to our ability to understand what you are telling us. You will patiently repeat yourself as many as 15 or 16 times (yes, we have counted) until we eventually figure it out. It is like a twisted game show where you are Alex Trebek and we are the the less than brilliant contestants — except you don’t berate us when we get the answer wrong. It usually goes something like this:

You: “poatetwing! poatetwing!”
Us: “potty seat?”

You: “poatetwing!”
Us: “pants are wet?”

You: “poatetwing!”
Us: “party sing?”

You: “poatetwing!”
Us: “pots and pans?”

You: “poatetwing!”
Us: “park and swing?”

You: “Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! PoatetWINGGGGG!”
Us: “Ohhh, you want to go to the park and swing!” Quickly followed by a high-five because we got it in under 10 guesses.

We go through this with you about 20 times a day. Sometimes we are better than others, but all the time you are as patient as though we are special ed students. I love that about you.

Another noteworthy change of late is that you are branching out in your tv worship. High Five will forever hold a place in your heart, but you have taken a renewed interest in your Baby Einstein and their lovely classical music soundtracks (the ones that NEVER get stuck in my head … ever.). And then there is Sesame Street. Along with your Elmo worship, you are now teaching me the finer points of Cookie, Oanie (Ernie), Bee Boad (Big Bird), Doaty (Dorothy), Noona (Mr. Noodle) and Zshoe (Zoey). You have even adopted the Elmo style of speaking wherein you talk about yourself in the third person: “Teppa toan, mama!” or “Teppa do it!” And yes, you still call yourself Teppa.

Have I metnioned your razor sharp memory? Gone are the days when we could dissuade you from a complete meltdown with the promise of treats and fun outings, knowing that your attentions could be easily diverted before we would ever have to follow through on said promise. Nowdays if we mention it we sure as hell better be able to deliver.

Recently, in an attempt to get you into the car without a wrestling match, we promised you a visit to Dore’s house. You reminded us of our promise each and everytime we stopped by exclaiming “Dowie How! Dowie How! Yah! Yah! Yah!” All day this went on until we had to deliver the sad news that Dore, indeed, was not actually home. You looked at us, puzzled, as if to say “But you said?!?” So we did what any good parent would do and tried to convince you that there was actually something BETTER than Dore’s house (which we all know is, categorically, untrue). “But Stella, don’t you want to go home and watch High Five?” You agreed, but we could see the look in your eye that said “I’m letting you off easy this time, and if you know what’s good for you you won’t try pulling this one again!” Duly noted.

Each week you get smarter and sweeter and I need these moments locked in print so that later on, when you are 14 and trying to talk me into letting you get your lip pierced, I will conjure these memories and go to my happy place.

Hope you’re feline better.

Celene called today to say that after weeks of not-himselfness, Scooter – their equivalent of Stella – was given the diagnosis of renal failure. Being the young pup – er, kit – that he is, he has good chances of living a life filled with tuna, pork and monkeys.

Be ye warned my young sister: just because you have chosen to have a cat instead of a child does not mean you won’t be required to shell out the equivalent of a college tuition. This time it is medical bills. Next time it may be a replacement set of living room furniture — lest you forget, part of the treatment protocol is that he has to be locked indoors at all times.

scooter

Get well soon, Scooter!

When standing in line for a beer in a plastic cup begins to lose its appeal.

In early June, we were lucky enough to have a visit from our good friend Shannon. We attempted an outing to the Oyster Festival, but quickly decided that waiting in line 45 minutes at one of the 3 remaining booths that was actually still open, was not our idea of a good time. We decided that, having been to our fair share of Oyster Festivals together, next year I would call her to let her know when it would be, and would then promptly make reservations for us at Hurricane Kate’s – a place to enjoy oysters, complete with comfortable seating, a full bar and no one in dread locks hitting you up for beer money.

So, we promptly packed back up in the car and headed for home, wherein we made a delicious dinner complete with wine and dessert. And, lucky for you, we caught it all on film.

The only thing that would have made this afternoon more perfect would have been a giant bouncy house.

The call of the wild.

Word of the week: Daaaaaaaadeeeeee!

Noteworthy pronunciation: ‘a’ an octave higher than ‘e’

Average volume level (on a scale of 1 to 10): 36

Noteworthy posturing: like that of a ski jumper in mid-air

Frequency of usage: approximately 642 times a day