Is there someone who could explain to me why babies come straight from the factory defaulted to nocturnal mode, leaving parents to have to spend the first month rewiring them? I would like to have a sit-down with the head of the product design department on who thought up this particular feature…and smack them around a little.

Aside from the sleeping glitches, Porter is awesome in about every other way. We are busy teaching him parlor tricks, and some basic survival skills like how to play blackjack and how to heat food on the manifold of a car. We suspect he will be a real renaissance man.

We have finally managed to get Stella to stop calling him Quarter and start calling him Porter, and are so pleased that she has exhibited nothing but love and sweetness towards him from the first moment she laid eyes on him. Being the yuckster she is, she is constantly is trying to tickle him and I know it is only a matter of time before she starts him in on her knock-knock jokes. Maybe someday they will take their act on the road.

After taking Porter in for his first official doctor visit today, I was informed that he still weighs nine and a half pounds. The doctor indicated that most newborns lose weight quickly after birth, and take about 10 days to get back to their original birth weight. I swore up and down that we hadn’t been feeding him Oreos and french fries and that, due to some breastfeeding issues, he had even experienced a 12-hour stretch where he hadn’t consumed a single ounce of anything. You’d think I’d be used to this kind of thing by now.

Thanks again to all of you who have sent along your good wishes and generous gifts. We feel very lucky to have such a supportive group of friends and family.

(click either here or on the photo to see a quick round-up of photos from Porter’s grand arrival)